Discussing Life Changes
Going out on disability
It’s hard to watch the people we care for struggle. We do what we can to help them, but many people like to feel independent, strong and capable of caring for themselves, on their own terms. Should that person get sick or suffer an injury, their desire to go on as if nothing has changed could end up doing more harm than good.
Leaving a job due to a disability can be a hard reality to face, both for the one leaving the job and the ones that job may support. It threatens that person’s ability to provide for family and friends. It puts family and friends in the position of caregivers or potential new wage earners and can change the general dynamic of the family relationship.
When someone you know is heading down that path, it’s time to talk. Use these tips to start that conversation:
- Be gentle, but honest. Start your conversation by acknowledging that this is a tough topic to handle. You might mention that while you respect their work, you’ve noticed a change in abilities that raises concerns that are worth talking over.
- Face facts. Be ready to use valid information available to support your concerns. Talk about doctor’s reports and statistics generated by people with similar symptoms or in a similar situation. Understand the likelihood of a condition improving and under what circumstances that could happen, and talk about the possibility that there would be no improvement or a condition could worsen. Understand the benefits that are available to you during this time and how this will affect your world.
- Establish a support system. Let this person know he or she is not alone. Let them know that there are people available, family, friends and professionals, who can help everyone make it through what might be a difficult transition.
- Be flexible. You may feel it’s time for someone to take disability, but the other person doesn’t agree. Be willing to listen to what they have to say. Try to compromise instead of making demands, despite what you feel may be best. In the end, you have to rely on the person who is sick or injured to tell you what they feel they can or can’t handle.
Going out on disability is an important decision. It requires careful planning supported by lots of open communication to ensure you take the best course of action for everyone involved. And, once you make the decision, the conversation needs to continue with friends, family members, medical professionals, financial advisors and anyone else who can help ensure that being out on a disability is, and continues to be the best thing for all.
This article is provided for general, informational purposes only and is not intended as advice specific to your situation.
